My daugther's AXBF/"father"-of-her-child shows up at the house yesterday and needs to talk to her about something. Turns out, his VERY ENABLING father sent him a check for $1,000 and has paid his rent (again!). Of course, this money is a loan (HA!) and AXF is supposed to make 20 monthly payments on it starting January 1, 2014. (HA! HA!) What in AXF's history has proven he will make even one payment????
Anyway, he wants to put the check in her account (he doesn't have one) and when it clears he'll have her transfer over to the new account he is going to open next week. Oh, and by the way, can she go ahead and get out $300 of it now so he can get his car repaired (on a Sunday in a snow/ice storm). She calls his dad and verifies that the check is legit and agrees to put it in her account. So, off he goes with $300 not to be heard from again until this morning. He comes by her work...and is high as a kite (!)... will she get $500 of it out at the ATM so he can go open his checking account? She says, that the check hasn't cleared yet so all the money is not in her account. He says, well can you just loan it to me out of your money until the check clears? She says no. He leaves, mad. And then the hateful texts begin. It's always crazy to me how it can go from so much "love" to so much hate.
We are really trying to get to a place where we recognize him for what he is, set boundaries, have no expectations, and not get so angry. Some days are better than others...