We all feel the same, it sucks living this way. My AH graduated from college with a Bachelors in Marleting with a 4.0 GPA, was an SAE, success was just waiting for him- now it is 12 years later and he's blown it, and he knows it. I work with a Doctor that was a SAE brother with him- I called my AH and told him I had seen him (my AH didn't know he was a DR>) and AH says, "Well, it's always nice to hear about friend who actually made something of themselves" He knows he's ruining his life and mine and won't do anything about it. He told me last night that he is sorry- but he is just not ready to stop drinking.
One thing that bothers me more than anything else is that I really believe he feels he is "to good" for the life we have- like he deserves more. He always complains that our house is crappy, (it isn't) and that he feels like it looks "trailer park" he thinks he is to good for the life we have.
Sometimes I think he feels like if he had just stayed on the right track- he wouldn't be married to me
or mabye it is just my insecurities
who knows