Originally Posted by
Leana 
I have a question for you, do you (or did you start) drinking to give you the courage to cope with social situations? Or are you drinking at home to avoid social situations?
I know you weren't askin me, but I'll tell you my deal anyhow. I started drinking for the courage to be with people, espcially girls. And it worked. For about a year to the date. Then it turned on me viscously and I started to experience extreme anxiety and panic, which made things a thousand times worse and pushed me to a place where I had to avoid things. I went from consciously using alcohol to make things easier, to absolutely needing it to function. The fears I had continually got worse, turned into full blown phobias, and in time I was unable to leave the house at all. Couldn't make it to the corner store to buy a quart of beer. Had to beg someone (my unwilling younger brother) to do it for me. I felt completely hopeless, and that hopelessness brought me to a complete surrender. I prayed some real earnest prayers before I actually put the drink down, and I believe those prayers led me to the people I needed to rescue me. Real bad pain isn't always a terrible thing. It can be an awesome starting point. Was for me, although I'd have never known it at the time.