oh thank you for your posts Skye2,Tabbj, Purpleknight, Yes I am fearful that my children do not heed what they have seen in their mothers behaviour as they grew up and yes I feel helpless with my ,seemingly never ending lectures, kids. I see their eyes roll and their but I'm not you mum....!....and yet to have them see their is some credence in the gene thing its not all I see...I see more than that I hear more than that...I see that my girl is increasing her consumption and warning bells go off for me...I hear my son say at age 13 HE got rotten drunk...All signs I do not want to ignore all signs I refused to see as stepping stones to the wrong reasons to drink. Social stigma is to get drunk in their age group...not have a quiet few drinks with friends but to get drunk....my daughter triggers my alarm bells when she says I need more than 2 or 3 ..8% drinks to get a shine on and then I am ok...and I see the face when I say....Your tolerance is increasing hun...After time it will get higher and higher...don't you remember I could drink and be the last one standing and still continue on through another day and another day and another day....please see the signs that you are drinking way more than your body can cope with and discard from your body...when your tolerance increases you are in danger of becoming dependant on alcohol although you cannot see it now I just can not sit by and watch with how you are drinking slow it down moderate yourself you are worrying me....half the time folks I feel neurotic and over the top but I feel I must watch their methods in case that addictive nature grabs them without them realising its taken hold of them...it is my job as a parent to look out for my children and I know many mistakes have to be made for them to realise the downfalls so a lot of the time I bite my tongue and just give that eyebrow raise and that mum look when I know speaking will not be heard and my girl has a little laugh and says yes mum I'm not overinduldging...my son he listens but at the time he makes out he doesn't want me to go on about it but in 3 months without associating with his friends he's been sober and has had one or two drinks under supervision with his sister...as I said to them if one is to learn moderation it is best done here around me so I can monitor them and they seem good with the idea mum is watching.