Originally Posted by
SunriseSky 
Dee I think you are right - this is sabotage. I was reflecting on Pipping's and Chaili05's very sensible advice to ask for his support. I can't do that. I am ashamed to admit that the times in our marriage that I have needed his support the most, have been the times when he has been most likely to withhold support, undermine me or sabotage me.
So I'm afraid to ask for his support because I'm afraid he'll try to deter me from the path I know I need to take. I can't have that happen. My highest priority right now is to stop drinking. I'll deal with the issues in my marriage some other day. Right now, I have to stay sober. Period.
I will dump that bottle if I need to, but thanks to all of you, it's not calling to me anymore. As I mentioned in my OP, I didn't even have a desire for a drink tonight until he showed up with the wine. I think his actions stirred up a lot of emotional garbage and anxiety that you've helped me clarify.
Thank you so much.
I too am sorry for the marital stress you are under... it's good you at least have your plan that if the urge gets too much you can always dump the wine. It also seems that you already practiced asking for support with us here on SR when the wine arrived and you started contemplating drinking it. That is fantastic!! It takes a lot to ask anyone for support and at least you feel safe doing so here
