Hi Coco,
I know this is hard to hear but your dad is doing you a favor. I wish my alcoholic dad had bugged out instead he terrified us with extreme abuse until each of us escaped as very broken traumatized kids at young ages.
The bad news is that you can't choose your relatives but you can choose your family and here at SR we have a family of posters who have rebuilt their lives by supporting each other. You can also find your own family of choice comprised of healthy blood relatives that are healthy as well as friends that you forge close relationships with.
You new life is just beginning and under the best of circumstances this is a tough time of change... how I wish you had a great dad who was there beaming and supportive... but you and I didn't get that and you know what? It's OK... because you can make it and find yourself and change your future to one of happiness, peace and serenity.
You have to work at it though... it's called recovery and its worth finding. I really recommend that you find an alanon meeting... try a few until you find a group you click with.
I also suggest that if the therapist isn't helping then try another and another until you find one that is helping. Make sure they are well versed in addiction and codependency issues... therapists are not created equal.
There are support groups for folks like us too (ACOA) Adult Children of Alcoholics and lots of books on the subject. When we grown up with emotionally unavailable dads it hurts us in ways we don't even know... your hardwiring right now is that you are unlovable and the truth is:
You are lovable but grew up in a toxic home where you had a selfish alcoholic father incapable of real love or healthy relationships. Now you have to rewire what you believe to what is true and untangle the mess your parents created with you in the middle!
So... today is the first day of your road to recovery... time is your friend... we are your friends so come back here often and share what you are feeling. We care. We understand all too well.
And it gets better! Really. YOu can overcome all of it! Take care of you and forget dad for now... maybe something will change some day but he is not worth the effort to try to figure out... there is no figuring out alcoholics anyway!