My children and I moved the end of May from AH of 12 yrs. 2DUI's, abuse, accidents, anger,etc. At first I felt at peace. He was texting constantly, being very obsessive, laying on the guilt trip. He started going to church on Sundays. Went thru the " I am done drinking to its ok if I have one or two, then wrecked his bike and went back to the Im done. Started seeing a counselor and physciatrist. Was put on about 4 different meds. Mood stabilizers, xanax and depression pills. Started feeling better about himself, not angry anymore. I was doing ok with being away. Then about a month ago, I really started missing him. He was letting me go, said he wasnt good enough for me. Well I caved and moved back a few weeks ago. Kids are doing fairly well and I was so excited. We were to start counseling together and do things as a family. I AM SOOOOOOO STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He is drinking every single day now, instead of couple times a week. Not always alot due to his meds but everyday. He has missed work and I think he has actually lost his job now. Always has excuses. Says he thinks he is doing good with his drinking. Passed out in bed last week, fully clothed and pissed himself in his sleep. Says he don't know where that came from because he didn't drink that much. He is not being mean or angry by any means. He is just either working or in his garage doing stuff and drinking. Kids are always with me. Some days, I don't even know if he speaks to them. How could I have been so naive and actually fell for the bull AGAIN?????????????? I feel horrible for what I am doing to my children, moving them back and forth. I cant do this anymore. How do I leave and do it for good???????????
