Originally Posted by
Katchie 
I dont know. I've heard some say its only fair to him I let him know what I'm doing. It would just be so nice if he came home sober. I'd tell him in the morning, but my mornings are so busy fixing breakfast and lunches before the boys head off to school. By the time I'm finished he has left for work. When he comes home from work he is almost always drunk or has been drinking -- something I've finally come to terms with. If I must I'll just continue doing what I'm doing.
In this situation I would just go on with honoring my boundaries & feel like I've done my best effort to try & inform him of any changes that he should be aware of. There is a limit to how much effort I am required to put into dancing around someone else's restraints.
If/when it finally comes up (aka: He Notices) I would very calmly state that I had had to make this change in the interest of the children's safety & while I would have liked to have a discussion about it, your intoxication made it impossible to have a conversation while sober, the way it needed to be.
And walk away.
Drop the rope - leave the conversation - do not engage. He can get as upset or self-righteous as he wants all on his own.