I didn't take it as criticism. I realize I'm still somewhat in the denial stage myself. What keeps tripping me up is that he appeared to be drinking less recently than he did in the early years of our relationship (prior to his first time quitting.) Prior to quitting last week, he'd been drinking again for about two years. He always follows the same pattern when he starts again. A couple months of just drinking a couple beers when watching a game, etc. Then, it's a couple more beers/week but never to drunkenness. A few months later, there's a party or social gathering and he drinks to excess. Followed by a week or two of not drinking much and then the slippery slope downward.
I'm really having to revise my definition of alcoholism. Growing up, my father drank beer nearly every night. 4, 6, 8, beers almost every night. Occasionally, even a case. He attended church regularly, ran a successful business, etc. He gave up alcohol every year for lent. That was "normal" for me. Redefining alcoholism requires me to admit that a number of people in my life are alcoholics
I'm working on it though.
ETA: I think my husbands pattern in recent years of quitting drinking every so many years has resulted in him not sliding back down to the stage he was at when we were first married. Since he'd switched to vodka this time, I do think had everything not happened with our son necessitating his quitting, this time may have been "that time." Switching to vodka as his "drink of choice" was new - always before he'd been a beer drinker.