Drinking was my solution
Drinking was my solution to everything to me. I used it to manage my entire life – both in good times and difficult time. I used drinking to dream & think creative. I thought my vision was better because I could let go of the worries and anxiety of the day and get my mind into another world. I loved my thinking when I was becoming intoxicated.
Thanks to God, I hit a point when drinking really became ineffective in so many ways. Problems piled up as a result. My creative thinking while drinking wasn’t working like used to be. I couldn’t hit that sweet spot anymore; so I thought the booze wasn’t working its magic so I would just drinking faster and harder which didn’t work either.
In the rooms of AA it talks about “1 day at a time” or “just for today”. This helps and make even more sense as I get some sober time under me. Someone said once not to confuse a bad day for a bad life and living in the moment and today helps me focus on not taking on worries of the past or future.
Although this “one day at a time” help, it is also helpful to review the past & dream about the future.
The past can be helpful particularly when helping someone else because you can use your past experiences both negative and positive to help someone going through the same in the present. Dwelling on past mistakes to a point of having an impact on your self-worth can be extremely dangerous though.
In terms of the future, for me anyway...having dreams and a vision on where I want to be is very helpful. When I think of the person I want to become, it helps me understand why I need to be put in the work today...particularly when it comes to recovery. Worrying about the future is another waste of time and again can be very dangerous.