Yeah by the end I was drinking alone quite often too. I'd just come home from work, or if I had the day off just sit in my apartment drinking. Not always to excess but frequently there were times if put down 3/4 to a bottle of vodka in a day. I didn't ever go a day without at least a few drinks. Those days when I only had a few made me felt like I was still in control, but within a week or two if have a blowout night and be on a bender for a couple days. Then I'd have terrible withdrawals. I'd create problems for myself with work sometimes. At a certain point a couple days ago I realized I couldn't continue lying to myself that there wasn't a problem with this after I got fired from a job for showing up blacked out, pissed off one of my friends who was telling me I need to quit drinking, almost got fired from my other job the next day, and four days later my body still doesn't feel good. This is my second day of sobriety. I've never tried it before, I once I admitted I need to change, I feel really committed to seeing it through. It was hard, but I reached out to family and friends. Somehow that makes me feel more accountable for my success or failure. I am strong willed so I think I can do this. I quit smoking as a pack a day smoker years ago. The difference is alcohol is so intertwined with my work / social life / every day pattern of behavior, I think that the biggest challenge for me. My strategy I suppose is to keep reminding myself of how absolutely terrible I felt physically and emotionally and that I never want to get there again. I finally admitted to myself that if I start down the road of even having one drink, eventually I will end up there, or worse.