My x cheated and his drug of choice was cocaine.
When everything unfolded and the truth came out I wanted to save my marriage. I knew drugs had a big part of his choices, and felt that if he would try, we could at least TRY to save our marriage. Cheating was harder to get over then the drugs. It was the betrayal of the one person as I thought I could trust like no other. He didn't want to work on our marriage, so I had no other choice than to let go.
Sometimes I want to thank him. Sometimes I wonder if he was smarter than I give I give him credit for. I wonder if I would of ever really been able to trust and move on again.
My new boundry is no way is cheating acceptable. I have HIGH standards for my next man. Not that I want a man in my life right now, but I have learned from all of this what a trustworthy man is. I will accept nothing less.
I know a lot of people disagree, but I believe drugs lead him to cheating. I think he was hanging out with the wrong people, horny and doing the drugs made him forget reality.
Another question is this. He hasn't contacted us (me and my son for a year). So, how much do the drugs have to do with the fact he has abandoned his son?
I believe drugs are 100% the problem.
Saying that does not by any means give them a get out of jail free card.