Relapse
Well....it appears that my wobble a while back wasn't really a wobble.....it was actually gut feeling (funny how we don't need evidence because gut feelings are usually so right)........my dear son has relapsed. It's out in the open now. He met a girl in NA and they relapsed together. Gosh but that is so cliché in the world of addiction, isn't it? It came "out" because the robust 175 pound man that came out of the Salvation Army is now.....maybe 145-150 pounds. He blamed it on his work which is very physically demanding. But I finally just asked.....and he admitted it.
Now that it's all out in the open, there is a kind of sense of relief in a way for all of us and the next steps are up to them. It is so out of my control. And there's a part of me that simply doesn't care what they decide to do. That sounds so sad and calloused but.......
I'm just done.
If a diabetic refused to take their insulin, exercise, and eat right.......I would have to let it go. Let go or be dragged........let go and let God......let go......or lose myself.
letting go
ke