Comparisons; "Now"
One of the things I’m trying to avoid are comparisons, like what “might” have been if I had been different, if I had not had this illness, what I might have “achieved”, the life I might have lived. And on occasion my spouse compares me with “other men”, “other husbands”. “Most men” she says, “do such and such.” “Other men find it useful to do ....”. "Other families..." And I find myself doing the same, “Other wives wear dresses like...”. It goes on and on: “Other kids seem more interested in what their parents are doing” “Other kids reach out, are not so passive and seemingly indifferent.” The only creature that escapes comparisons may be the dog. And the dog doesn’t seem to be playing “Other”. I suspect that cats do this all the time: “Other owners are this way, that way, etc." "How come you’re not doing that?” "Other cats get fed [such and such]!" "Why don't you... [Other owners do...]!"
What I’ve got to realize is that “comparisons” get me nowhere. I live in the “Now”. As someone once said, “What you see is what you get”. Focus on the “Now”. Don’t dwell on the “Past”. That’s “over”. Try not to worry about the “Future”. That may be different than you think. If I focus on the “Now” the
“Now” becomes the “Future”. I think there’s a book about this. “The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment” by Eckhart Tolle. Maybe I’ll take a look at it.
Anybody have any thoughts along these lines?
W.