had a small revelation
I was thinking, as I always do at the moment, about how I desperately needed for my ex to forgive me. That it meant everything to me. And he was giving me all this anger.which I totally understand. And then it dawned on me. More important than him forgiving me is that I forgive myself and be kind to me. Which means staying away from him. Because just as I started to feel happy he made me want to hate myself and feel soooo guilty. Which if I want to get better I can't do. Maybe I'm wrong.but maybe my forgiveness is more important.