An oldtimer in AA told me once when I was having a really bad time that he thinks of it this way: There's a "lower power," just like a "higher power," but the lower power is your disease. It's cunning and baffling, right? So when it has a feeling that you are about to escape from it, it starts getting desperate and pulling out all the stops to get you back, just pulling you down really hard. He said if I try to think of it that way, I'll know that something good is on its way and maybe things are especially hard right now because they are about to get a whole lot better. That really helps me at times like this.
