Isolating
What exactly is Isolating....?
That may sound like a curious question (I find it curious that I'm asking), as up until this morning, I'd say it is something that I do. I now find that actually, I do something that may or may not be isolating.
This thought occurred to me as I was reading through the Big Red Book of ACoA... it suddenly dawned on me that really, deep down, I'm not sure that I know.
This is my understanding, I'd welcome any better definitions or greater insights, or clarity. Alternatively, feel free to tell me I have the best definition ever written by man - I won't believe you, but I'll take the compliment anyway :-)
Isolating is and can be both physical and psychological. Isolating in a physical sense is fairly obvious it means being alone, without others and leans heavily towards avoidance as opposed to choosing to be by oneself for positive action say... to meditate, read the paper, do some 'work'.
In a psychological sense isolating does not necessarily mean physical separation. It means being disconnected from those that are present; Retreating into ones own mind; Pretending all is not as it really is e.g. I feel sad, but when asked I'll say I feel good. It is an attempt to escape from oneself and others.
Isolating can include not discussing with others experiences you're encountering, usually (but not necessarily) experiences which are uncertain, or unpleasant to a certain degree. It (isolating) can include for example NOT sharing in a 12 step meeting.
Isolating is therefore an attempt to hide the manifestation of fear and shame or other painful feelings from other people. It is a pretense and lie; a mental trick similar to denial, it is/can be an attempt to ignore, by self deception a negative emotion or state of mind and being.
I've no idea if my understanding is close to, or way off the mark. It 'feels' right... What's your understanding and definition?
M