james872

Hi,

I went to rehab a short while ago. At the risk of noone believing me and things like that, I will still tell my story.

Shortly into it, they monitored me physically. I was fine. Then there were the group sessions, the counseling stuff, everything.

One thing, if they allow you, bring your own razors. Unless you want to peel the skin off your face.

So I got into therapy, group stuff, counseling and they told me I picked it up and had some interesting insights. Eventually they got to telling me that "they had never thought of that but it was great and why are we needed? You got it better than us".

That is in fact the reason it is difficult for me to post this because noone might believe it.

Literally, I will quote, one counselor saying to another during a group session: "... I guess we're no longer needed". It wasn't tongue in cheek.

So there was nothing they could do for me. There's a lot I could do for them apparrantly.

So one specialist with an IQ which had the level that a person has that just takes the situation as it is. A person who asks "What's going on here, given that all those people think this is true?". A basic approach if you ask me...

Anyway, he simply asked me, finally the understanding I was looking for: "So you have this impact, why is drinking still a problem for you?".

I already knew the answer. I had been telling everyone and was in the process of getting that taken care of myself, in the psychiatry department.

"It's my trauma, that's it". Fortunately he believed me and I will tell you, that is the friggin reason.

So now I'm back at my parent's house. Not cured, still inclined to drink, might even do it. But the good thing is, my appointment with a psychiatric has been labeled urgent and tomorrow at 9:30 AM I have an appointment. Finally. I knew what the problem was, I can predict the outcome of the tests, and what will work as help.

I appreciate their attempt, but it wasn't what solved my problem. And when the people who treat you look at you with huge eyes of disbelief just like the people who take your IQ test, you know you're not in the right place.

Hung-over, dazed, scored a nice 169. And I really wasn't in the mood.

And P vs NP isn't solvable as far as I can tell.

I told you it would be a story difficult to believe. And what I told you is personal, which I don't like. But I chose honesty and here it is.

J.