Wine Whine
I'm wondering, maybe someone had something similar?
Weeks ago my husband told me not to let his dad come over and remove his wine collection. His dad called me last week about it, my husband knows him so well. I told FIL what my husband said. My FIL said it shouldn't be there when he gets home from rehab, he has to stop drinking. I said he doesn't drink it often anyway, but he enjoys collecting it, and his dad knows this. I told my FIL, he said for me to tell him if he took it, he would buy 20x as much to replace it. That made my FIL mad. I told him I agree H shouldn't drink but the wine is his, and we can't get rid of it. It's his choice what he does with it. I mean besides his having worked to collect it, the bottles have value, it seems wrong to take it from him. Even worse to put a lock on the door like my FIL next suggested.
Part of me wants to say yes come get it and it won't be me he is angry with. I dont want anything here to trigger him, or provide easy access. But a bigger part of me says no it's wrong, and he already told me his wishes. But is it wrong? I mean if I find drugs hidden I will throw them out before he comes home. I did find some suspicious looking stuff in his bathroom and threw it out.
Im going go ask one of the counselors about it, ask if we should talk about it together in a session. My only fear is if it's there and he was having a weak moment, he might turn to it. Before anyone says it, I know it's his choice if he drinks, but I also know addiction, triggers, and cravings cause people to think irrationally and make poor choices. Its in the brain function. He is early in this and won't have a lot of practice dealing with situations and applying what he has learned to deal with triggers and emotions. This is why I find the decision confusing.
Also I dont drink much, especially at home, its not an issue of my wanting to drink it or anything.