Taking care of oneself
I've been thinking about how my self-destructive behavior isn't limited to alcohol consumption. Though I am so familiar with the urge to drink it all away, it still seems strange to me that I am like this. Some part of me is healthy enough not to think that it is normal to get tanked, not nourish myself, sleep with people that I do not care about, have no future goals, etc.
For me, so much of the pain I have been experiencing getting sober is really seeing these behaviors for what they are. Desperate acts and depressed habits. I see myself with more compassion, but I still suffer through self-loathing every day. Defining this conflict has been a step forward for me.
Just my 2 cents today.