Just my own thoughts, if you compare alcoholism with say diabetes, more as a metabolic condition, you would be horrified if your spouse refused treatment and even acted in a way to make things worse. That doesn't mean you'd leave him, but you would have the right to be very angry at him because it's not just himself he is hurting.
But say the metabolic condition had the further effect of causing him to steal, have harmful mood changes, lie, check out of your marriage. Would you accept that his failure to treat it with everything going was a choice that put your marriage second?