Honeypig and recovering2 thanks for welcome, I actually checked out alanon medium times yesterday and 2 are on my work days the other 2 at a time when putting daughter to bed but my work days are changing next month so hopeful I can attend then although it seems scary to me. I feel somewhat of a. Of a 'wimp' after just 14 months together and feeling this way and take my hat off to anyone who has one who has lasted longer or still with someone who is an alcoholic. You're right I had an arsey bellowing phone call from him n vicious txts- just makes me more determined to stay away as reaffirms my decision. Regarding his mother I feel sorry for her and we always got along well - he's 2 other children live in different cities, her husband just shows anger and she hasn't told any of her friend's as she is ashamedsn I'm probably the only person she can talk to? I'm not ready to cut a link from her yet, what do others feel about that?