Slope
I feel the same as you all the time my friend, it's not so much the doc as it is any kind of mind altering substance makes it easier to go to the doc. I was sober for a few years and then started having beers at hockey games, within a month I had lost everything I spent years working on! Other friends have done the same! Eight years is an incredible achievement and some wine is so not worth it!! Just my advice because you have really accomplished something here.