AW, I've been following your threads for a while now. It seems that every time you make plans to get more help and support, something inevitably falls through. Maybe you can come up with a back-up plan for next time so you can get the help you say you want?
Also, you say quite frequently that if you go back to your hometown, you WILL drink. You pronounce it as a foregone conclusion. But if you really don't want to drink, and you really are committed to your recovery, you can choose not to drink. If you do go to your hometown and drink, keep in mind that it is your choice and your decision. Location doesn't force anyone into drinking. If you want to drink, you can drink anywhere. If you want to stay sober and are willing to work hard for it, you can stay sober anywhere.
Sending good thoughts your way!