Today so far has been a great day for me mentally. I am actually taking great pleasure in household chores and doing stuff for my family and feeling good that its not just all about me and how i'm feeling. The drinking days seem so selfish to me now when I look at them and I just couldn't see that I was leaving everything that needs doing to my poor wife who was suffering in her own personal hell with the fact that she wanted me to stop drinking so much and in her mind it was starting to look like it would never happen and the poor women just got on with it. How UNFAIR! was that. I had no idea until now the extent and misery that my drinking caused to the running of everyday life and how those things can break a marriage. Such small things like never doing the dishes etc after a long long time do have an impact on the person having to do everything, while the drunk person just sits and drinks all the time. I feel ashamed of my selfish past and I also feel extremely proud that im sitting here on day 34!! writing this post.
Sober life is gradually showing and teaching me things about myself that I had once known but had forgotten for over 15 years. My life feels like its starting to become a life again. I never thought it ever would. There's hope for us all.
