Winnie, I'm so sorry it has come to this, but I applaud your clarity of vision in knowing what you need to do and your strength in doing it.
There have been some other threads recently about life after leaving the A, like this one:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...up-addict.html
I hope you get a chance to read some of those and that they help you keep your 'eyes on the prize' as you move on with your life.
Again, so sorry for all you've been thru...