Welcome to SR, Drwiggles, and glad you got here. That is a tough situation you're in, no doubt.
This is a wonderful community, and you can learn a lot and feel very accepted and supported here. People will not sugar coat what they say, but it's from experience and from the heart...
Have you considered Alanon as a way to get some further education and face-to-face support too? Here's a link to help you find a meeting.
https://www.google.com/#q=alanon
Please read as much as you can here, and also maybe check out the Friends and Family of Substance Abusers section, listed right below this one on the forum main page. Gradually you'll be able to sort out your thoughts and feelings.
Again, welcome!