I have been wanting him to be well for a long time I couldn't understand why I wouldn't be more ecstatic. We concluded that I am questioning why I wasn't good enough or enough, feelings of anger over my own guilt in events that occurred when we separated (I ruminate and wonder if my actions were different would he have sought recovery sooner?) and lastly anger that the opportunity to be a supportive wife was taken from me by meth.
remember the three C's - didn't cause it, can't control it , can't cure it.
it was NEVER about you, about you being good enough, doing or saying the right thing. HIS addiction is 100% HIS.
and now he's finally to a point of getting himself into rehab and start dealing with it. when HE was ready. again, that decision isn't about you, or anything else except him accepting help to deal with the monster known as meth addiction.
you don't HAVE to do anything now. he called, it was brief. he's in rehab, GOOD FOR HIM. any addict getting clean is a miracle, one life snatched from the jaws of addiction is something to rejoice. but it's only a beginning....rehab isn't the the fix or the cure, it's merely a place of rest and respite....time to get a few days clean time put together and learn some tools to help you stay clean. for life, one day at a time. he is not well yet.