I wonder where all the not-worse-case scenario people hang out?
I went to a meeting last week and a man was there with his wife of ten years celebrating his six year anniversary of sobriety.
I love him with all my heart but I've also been clear about my boundaries when it comes to dealing with the crazy. I've now read Codependent No More and am fully aware that I have seriously been enabling though. So that will need to change. Frankly, not enough anger and resentment had the time to build up before boundaries were, and are continuing to be, put in place. I had a really bad boyfriend about ten years ago who was mentally I'll and that taught me a lot of hard lessons early. I think with boundaries, healthy detachment, and proper mindfulness on my part and a willingness not to give up on himself on his part we could potentially be okay.
So for right now we just won't get married. We'll reasses in a year. I'm just really sad because it was going to be a beautiful day and we were both really looking forward to it. I do feel let down and angry at him for having a problem that makes this necessary. But honestly, I'd feel that way even if we were actually canceling because of his back surgery. Sick is sick.