I know she has the right to her opinion. However, I'm 36 years old. AB is 42
You are certainly old enough to make your own decisions, right or wrong and regardless of what she thinks of them.
As long as you rely on her for daycare, you will probably have to listen to her rants and put up with her wrath if you don't live like she dictates. If you can do this great, but it strikes me that you are posting here because you are torn between your life as an adult and your life as her child.
Sweety, sometimes we just have to find a way to move forward. If you can find a job closer to home or move to your own place or shared place closer to work, that might help.
I don't have all the answers for you but I can tell you that the situation you are living in would make me crazy too, no matter how much I loved my mother.
I really really hope you can figure out something that works for you.
Hugs