Toomuch
Im sorry you're suffering. The thing is with this whole dual diagnosis lark and something you will know well is you can't get away with treating one and not the other. Took me many painful years to realize and accept that.
You know any attempt at "moderation" is a waste of time for you and will end badly. Evn if your brain is foggy, you have enough time behind you to know that. You need to cling on to some certitudes here of which that is one and try and right the ship as best you can.
Be strong.