Hey everyone,
Soooo tired. But wanted to check in and say hello.
1stepup, I've been thinking a lot about the flat feeling I get sometimes. The more I think about it the more I think it has to do with my underlying issues more than it does with the drinking... like from the get go I wanted more more more of everything. Turn up the volume. So now that I'm not drinking, it's not so much that I'm missing out on the fun of drinking, it's that I have to learn what I should've in the first place, which is that things can be good in a quieter way than what I think I want.
It's also led me to seek out things to do that don't make me feel like I need more. Like all this exercise I've been doing... I never realized I liked sports before, but I like the intensity a lot. And scary movies! I hated scary movies when I was a drinker because my nerves were always shot. Now that things are quiet I just can't get enough. I love the adrenaline.
Man listen to me... at 10 years sober I'll be BASE jumping at this rate. (no, no I won't)
Anyway that's all.
I'm in that awful spot where I've got only a couple hours to sleep before I have to be up, but I was working till late so my brain's still buzzing. Going to go force myself to lie down.
Hugs to you all