Clever post earthsteps. I was drinking and lurking, and your post made me decide to speak up. I suppose I am in the phase where I am beginning to seek options for help after finally starting to reach the point where I can admit to myself that I have a real problem. I have been in denial for years I think and every time I get to a point where I can finally admit to myself or others that I have a problem I will quit for a few days, or weeks, then decide that was easy and no big deal and obviously I have control because I can just quit anytime I want and then I start drinking again and the whole cycle repeats. Day one is four or five drinks, day two is seven or eight, day three is 12, and then day four I black out. The hardest part about quitting is just admitting that you must quit and never touch alcohol again ever. That you really have no control and never will. That your willpower is not strong enough to conquer alcohol. I haven't been able to do that yet. At least not for more than a few days. Any thoughts?