Originally Posted by
bigsombrero 
You can't change the past. Why don't you go into work, just like everyone else, and concentrate on your job. There is no need to be living in fear and sneaking around and having such anxiety in your life. Do you plan to address the alcohol problem in your life?
A loud second to this. I too remember, the fear, the anxiety, the shame, guilt and embarrassment of having to cover my tracks over my drinking and the behaviour that resulted. Over and over and over.
But brother, believe it or not, you don't have to live like that anymore. Life is possible sober, and it's so much more fulfilling and enjoyable than drinking. Your disease will try to tell that's not true. Had me convinced for a long time.
Being able to walk down the street, meet new people, and not be scared or worried about people finding out I'm a drunk who has a problem, not pretending to be someone else is.... awesome.
Be well.