those calls can really do a number on US...which is a big reason why NO contact is suggested. first his "message" was kind of rambling and nonsensical ad trying not to sound cold hearted, a lot like somebody who was probably high and "drug dialing".
when you are in less of an emotional state it might be a good idea to be your own reporter and write down the fACTS of your years together.....from what you shared here they just don't sound THAT wonderful.....just like addicts we tend to romanticize the "good times" and just like addicts trying to chase that first really good hit, we too try to chase that one really good moment or six.