Aww May. I'm so sorry you're hurting. One of the things I have uncovered in both sobriety and in therapy is I battle with "relationship addiction" probably as much as I have battled with alcoholism. The festering roots grow in the same ole personal garden. I found this article rather enlightening awhile back. We typically resonate with those of the same emotional maturity and intimacy issues. Water seeks its own level.
Relationship Addiction