A sidenote: I've been *WAY* up front since the divorce started that I'm not looking to date and this isn't a date and I'm not ready to date. There is no ambiguity. If I'm getting together with someone, it's for enjoyable company. It sounds awkward, but I'm telling you a good sense of humor and the ability to laugh at oneself softens any blow.
If someone isn't mature enough to understand that, they're not your pal.
When I'm ready to date, I'll find a way to make it light and funny and CLEAR also.