My wife is not drinking for 30 days (is the plan) then plans on moderating, which is another point of concern for me, as I'm not sure how that will work and is why I NEED outside support. Because while alcohol is not my doc it always led me to pick up, and I therefore plan to abstain completely from it. I will continue trying to get to a meeting, and hopefully find some sober support outside of home. I appreciate everyone taking the time to respond here.
Managed to drag my ass off the couch and get to the gym which has helped me feel substantially better.
CH