I had a wise person tell me once that recovery is like a pendulum. Sometimes you have to swing to the extremes for awhile as you are working your recovery until you come into a happy medium.
I felt very selfish at periods of time in this process, and I feel like I took up a lot of space. Just in the past few weeks I have realized that I am not quite stuck in that space any longer.
I would say I was there for a bit (12-18 months). I would also say it was harder because it was such an unfamiliar place for me.
It was also really good for me. I used to be so "giving" to others, but really that was about making myself feel useful and good. This helped me to see really where the focus needed to stay.