To both Zaks and hopegone, welcome to SR! This site has been such a source of education and comfort to me; I hope both of you find the same here.
In my opinion, you are both smart to be making moves towards financial independence. As was said, it's a good idea on so many different levels.
I also want to echo the advice about Alanon. You may or may not agree with every little thing that is said, but overall, there is nothing like it for in-person support and growth. As they say in Alanon, "Take what you like and leave the rest." Here's a link to find meetings
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/ And yes, Zaks, I think crying at meetings is pretty much expected--more the norm than the exception, in my experience!
Again, so glad both of you have come here and I wish you both peace and clarity as you move ahead.