Binge drinking out of control
I don't have a daily struggle with alcohol, I don't even have a weekly one. I don't crave it, and I have only have a drink by myself once a year at most. But I think I have an issue now with alcohol where when I do start, I cannot stop. I try to pace myself, but eventually it gets to the point where I am buzzed, then everything I planned goes out the window and I start the bad behaviors.
The day after with the guilt, the shame, humiliation, and embarrassment is so painful, yet I kept on doing it forgetting about the time before or thinking this time would be different. I just want this to stop, I want to become a better person. I just cannot keep doing this and living like this. The things I say and do sicken me. My friends are all bigger drinkers than me, I try to tell them sometimes how miserable I am with the drinking and they say its all in your head, it's not as bad as you think...I was talking to one of them at the bar the other day and started to cry for no reason, a grown man crying for no reason.. I want to just go out and be sober, I think I would enjoy myself so much more. I finally think it's time to get everything in order and become the man I know I can be. Any help or advice would be appreciated