Thank you for posting this allforcnm, since I have been here you have become one of my favorite posters. I was feeling so down weeks ago and you posted something and I printed it out and have read it over and over. This article is very helpful also because I do have some things to learn about enabling I guess even though my husband is in rehab right now. I really hate all the negative approaches to dealing with this stuff. I have been reading books for a few weeks, and even some of the rehab stories are disturbing because they seem to treat people with so much disrespect, and have ideas that people need to be punished instead of healed. My husbands rehab is not like that for sure, but there are some weird ideas out there.