Thanks Lexie. I've already had quite a few of those thoughts and I haven't even left yet! I've even had times when I couldn't quite seem to bring into focus why I was deciding to leave, blinded by some small comfort I felt from him. In those times I've tried to give it up to my HP, knowing that, even tho I couldn't see why right now, leaving was the best thing for me and that whatever happened. as long as I stay focussed on me, I will be OK. I feel anxiety in my chest, but calmness in my heart. Its scary, but its the right thing.