I moved to Denver, the place I always wanted to be.
I never did any of this. in the past two weeks:
drank at work
drove crazy drunk a lot
made up some sickness as an excuse
and I haven't thought a damn thing because I am still getting stuff done. my relationship life is so messed up.
I am messed up, dude. I have no connections with god, never have.
I am so so sadly and lonely and I am not like that, and I chose it. I am choosing this. And I think it won't stop ever. Drinking is my persona now because it has been for so long. I would be lost otherwise. I think I am a gonner with it honestly. I don't think I will change ever. /rant