jealous
Sometimes I feel annoyed when I'm around happy people. I used to be really disgusted with people who were very spiritual in every aspect of their life. I think for me it's because they have what I want. I want to be happy all the time, who doesn't? But we're human beings and God gave us other emotions besides happiness; he gave us those emotions for a reason. So as yourself and ask your higher power whey you are feeling the way you are. What is the purpose? Once that answer comes, you might start to break free from this "rut."