Hi..I have just started down the road of recovery. I decided to write down the ugly truth to alcoholism. Even when you think you have done bad some alcoholic has done worse. This is my truth:
My journey...
Oh my dear God...
How did i get here. I am an alcoholic!! I hated my mother for so many years because she would not quit!
Here I am my mother. If I had one wish i would wish that i could have had a normal childhood. The pain was just to much. Tried to kill myself at sixteen. Scream for help. My brother found me in the bathroom drunk and bleeding from my wrists.
Not sure what normal is. Why does this hurt so much.
Drink to feel good, drink to feel confident, drink because i just dont care, drink because im celebrating, drink because im depressed, drink to forget, drink to remember, drink to numb
How does this happen you loose control!
Blackouts that I tried to hide by pretending I remember
The downward spiral
The hangovers, the self hate, the brusing from a fall
I will not die a drunk! I am stronger than this poison...
MD