Arrii,
It creeps up on us...the amount we drink....you have come to a good place for support and to read about other people's struggles. You can get things under control...I just know it. I am on Day 7 and 2 weeks ago I couldn't have even imagined cutting back much less quitting. Its a day at a time, sometimes an hour or minute at a time. Good luck on your journey. We can encourage each other.