Originally Posted by
zjw 
But i get scared myself even to detour from the course.
Yeah, maybe I am hyper-sensitive and still am wary. It sounds kind of silly now, I didn't eat much salad for a week and now I'm freaking...ha. But seriously, the dirty clothes, the odd sleeping hours, the diet - it was out of character for me and it spooked me. I am very keen and aware when I start to get out-of-whack.
For me, I fear that even the slightest inch downhill could result in a very fast and violent fall. My alcoholism became out of control and very scary in a short period of time, so little signs like this freak me out. Perhaps I am a bit on the paranoid side, but I am that way for a reason.