Ok so I have posted about how great I have felt and how AA scares me because of the facing issues making amends etc.. I am not attending meetings but I am however sober, clean and journaling all my feelings and I am getting depressed from everything that sobriety is bringing out of me.
I know now exactly why I drank and did drugs, there is too much to face from the past that I just don't want to think about. Bad choices, lost time, hurt and pain, etc...
Stopping drinking for me is the easy part, wanting to deal with all this crap isn't something that I wanted to begin with and THAT makes me want to get high and drink!
Of course I am a frikin ADULT and the scape of drinking and drugs isn't an option for me anymore.. So dealing with the depression, crankiness etc.. Is all I can do.. Maybe journaling is not a good thing when you r PMSING!
Please someone tell me you can relate! I always find comfort here! Thanks..
