@August: Thanks. It is tough, the moving thing: One problem is how to get around bad credit, and less than glamorous references. I've almost thought of seeing if somebody will act as a fake landlord! I know it sounds bad, but I'm not sure what else to do...I don't wanna have to move to one of the most dangerous parts of this city, like the ones you see on shows like Homicide and The Wire!
@dawn: Thanks, as well. I hadn't realized I carried on without a period in my post for that long! I do spend a good deal of time reading and contemplating things on the train part of the journey. The leaning against poles at the bus-stops is harder, as is the bus, as I feel I have to be more aware of my surroundings/alert. But I did come across those lines quoted in a novel, then I proceeded to find their source, and other works like them...
@Kitty: That's what I've also thought: I need to find more meaningful things to fill my Saturdays that I can get to. Sometimes, a friend has visited, and we go hiking, maybe once a month, he comes though town. But I need to look into stuff I can do that's nearby, poetry, maybe hiking if I can get a ride outta the city. Something. I like bowling.
~
One thing I have found in quitting drinking: That I am easily lonely, something I have been prone to since being a very small child. This feeling of isolation, and longing to connect. It seems to recharge me: without this, I find even my creative energy drained.